I have a favourite tree in Glasgow. I go and sit in it whenever I feel a bit agitated, or happy, or sad. It works for all emotions really. It is carpeted in soft moss and hangs over the river Kelvin. It's actually two trees intertwined with each other. Beautiful creature. Anyway, one day I was sitting in this tree, gazing over the river and feeling absolutely nothing. Suddenly I turned around to see a Chinese woman flagrantly taking a picture of me with her bright pink smartphone.
Neither of us knew what to do. She stood there frozen for a few seconds holding up her phone. I had turned around really abruptly and directed my gaze directly at her, as if I knew I was being looked at. But I wasn't really thinking of anything, and although I was surprised to find myself being of photographic interest to a random passerby, I wasn't particularly annoyed. But I made no attempt to make her feel better either. She looked absolutely terrified, as if embarrassed for blatantly invading my private moment of contemplation, and very awkwardly put the phone away and continued walking.
It made me think that we are no longer alone in this world. As if suddenly we have all become little celebrities, and can't do anything without the danger of being captured by a slew of cameras. We need to go around under cover, sunglasses and hoods, and try and stay off everyone else's radar. Or we need to be hyper-conscious of how we present ourselves to the world.
I imagine this woman posting this image somewhere (why else take a photo if not to post it somewhere?), with a comment on how romantic life in Scotland is. Something really cheesy that has nothing to do with how I was experiencing that moment. Now I am for ever trapped in this cheesy, unrealistic image of Scottish life, perhaps liked by friends back in China who wistfully dream of going abroad, and doing a PhD at Glasgow University, for example. The picture elicits in these hypothetical friends mixed feelings of inspiration and envy, happiness and self-loathing. The usual Facebook experience. Which makes me think of social media as similar to reading Hello! magazine. Except we are much more involved because it is our real life friends living wonderful lives. How much do we project onto these images, and are we able to deal with it?
Neither of us knew what to do. She stood there frozen for a few seconds holding up her phone. I had turned around really abruptly and directed my gaze directly at her, as if I knew I was being looked at. But I wasn't really thinking of anything, and although I was surprised to find myself being of photographic interest to a random passerby, I wasn't particularly annoyed. But I made no attempt to make her feel better either. She looked absolutely terrified, as if embarrassed for blatantly invading my private moment of contemplation, and very awkwardly put the phone away and continued walking.
It made me think that we are no longer alone in this world. As if suddenly we have all become little celebrities, and can't do anything without the danger of being captured by a slew of cameras. We need to go around under cover, sunglasses and hoods, and try and stay off everyone else's radar. Or we need to be hyper-conscious of how we present ourselves to the world.
I imagine this woman posting this image somewhere (why else take a photo if not to post it somewhere?), with a comment on how romantic life in Scotland is. Something really cheesy that has nothing to do with how I was experiencing that moment. Now I am for ever trapped in this cheesy, unrealistic image of Scottish life, perhaps liked by friends back in China who wistfully dream of going abroad, and doing a PhD at Glasgow University, for example. The picture elicits in these hypothetical friends mixed feelings of inspiration and envy, happiness and self-loathing. The usual Facebook experience. Which makes me think of social media as similar to reading Hello! magazine. Except we are much more involved because it is our real life friends living wonderful lives. How much do we project onto these images, and are we able to deal with it?
I love the word 'intertwined'. Sounds like great, brainless sex.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I just wanted to say that some people take pictures with the idea of posting them somewhere, but when they get to their computers, plug that bright pink camera to it and review their photos, they find out they really suck at it. Then they get depressed and proceed to mindlessly zap through tumblrs until they cry themselves to sleep. Fucking retards.
There is something truly, dangerously depressing in trying to figure ourselves out and prove our self-worth (or lack thereof) through tumblr.
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